To be a man…

by James

…you must first kill the boy.

I’m 25 on the outside, but realistically, my maturity is far below. I’m still a little boy inside. I still cling to all these habits and defense mechanisms I developed as a kid that I need to stop.

In the 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, Covey talks about the different levels a person can be at. Dependent -> Independent -> Interdependent.

I was in such a comfortable state for so long I had forgotten what it was like to have to fight. I became dependent in my comfort. I need to get to the independent stage again.

It’s a kid’s game to think the world owes you something. That simply being alive entitles you to all these great things and they will just come. That used to be true when your parents and school took care of you. You’re on your own now.

You want money? You have to earn it by delivering value. You want more money? You have to deliver more value or sell it better. You want that girl? She’s not going to come up to you, you’ve got to go to her.

A mature, independent man is the pillar of strength that the world can revolve around and trust.

Forget dealing with the world and it’s problems for now, that’s an interdependent man’s problem, first fix yourself.

To be trustworthy, you need to be able to trust yourself. If you commit yourself to doing something, and you don’t follow through, you’re lowering your own trust in yourself.